One of the most important rules of giving good head is actually wanting to give good head. Try out a few and see what you and your partner like most! 4. Whether you like the taste of coconut oil or prefer a water-based lube, there are plenty of lube options out there that can change your blow job game. In addition to helping prevent discomfort for both the giver and the receiver, “ a flavored lubricant can make it more enjoyable for the giver as well,” Lawless adds. Plus, sometimes, generating enough saliva can be difficult, especially if you’re dehydrated, Skyler says-but using lube will make the experience easier, hotter, and wetter all-around. Lube can be a game-changer in all types of sexual activity, but especially during blow jobs. "For givers, if they're on their knees, get a pillow so the knees are supported," Skyler suggests. If you're still uncomfortable, though, you can use cushions (or a sex pillow) for extra padding. This position will also help you move from your core, as opposed to over-straining your neck muscles. One go-to position might be kneeling between your partner's legs so you can "easily cup the testicles," says Jenni Skyler, PhD, an AASECT-certified sex therapist and director of The Intimacy Institute. “It can also assist with endurance, creativity, and overall satisfaction.” “A comfortable position provides physical ease, minimizes discomfort, and improves concentration and sexual performance,” says Lawless. So, make sure you and your partner are in sustainable positions to make the situation more enjoyable all around. There's nothing worse than giving a blow job and getting a cramp or feeling physically uncomfortable in some way. “This allows partners to feel safer, comfortable, valued, less anxious, and uninhibited while being free to enjoy all the pleasure sexual play can provide,” Lawless says. “Consent is essential for any sexual encounter and provides a layer of trust and respect,” says Lisa Lawless, PhD, a sexual health expert and CEO of Holistic Wisdom.Įven if things are hot in the moment and you’re positive they’re ready for a blow job, ask the person beforehand and get consent instead of assuming they want something. No matter how well you know your partner, establishing consent before engaging in any sexual act is crucial. So, what else should you know about blow jobs aside from the.uh.basics? Well, here's exactly how to take your oral sex game to the next level, according to certified sex therapists. "Although it may not seem as intimate because there isn't as much face-to-face contact, the willingness to do this adds a level of trust and intimacy that is underappreciated," explains Kimberly Resnick Anderson, LCSW, a certified sex therapist based in Los Angeles. Giving or receiving oral sex isn't everyone’s thing (reminder: your sexual preferences are only decided by you, and no one should ever make you feel bad about them!), but when you’re really clicking with a partner, a blow job can be a great way to amp up affection. Your mouth is wet and warm, like a vagina (or a lubed-up hand), but your lips and tongue are living, roving, irreplaceable works of art. Not to mention, unlike a hand job or even penetrative sex, no one can replicate the sensation of a blow job on their own (obviously). The visual element of watching one's own penis slip in and out of a mouth really gets a lot of people going, Marin adds. " love blow jobs because the act feels like sex, but it's a very different experience-they get to relax and receive and just enjoy what's happening in front of them," says Vanessa Marin, LMFT, a certified sex therapist in Los Angeles. But for many, just receiving a blow job is a huge turn-on. Well, it's ultimately subjective-as is the case with every sexual act, different people like different things. How do you give a good blow job, anyway? Sex ed definitely didn't cover this. Though taking full control of your partner's penis or strap-on can feel empowering, you may have sometimes wondered if your oral sex technique could use a little improvement. It can be intimidating, sure, but it's also an exciting sex act to have in your pleasure arsenal.
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